Tonight's Jeoparty is brought to you by Aleve. WHAT IS JK WE DON’T HAVE SPONSORS.
WHAT IS WE DON’T KNOW WHAT WE’RE DOING. WHAT IS WHAT HAVE OUR LIVES BECOME.
I meannnnn...hello there. Hi.
We are just two single, fun-loving gals who like to watch Jeopardy every night. Except last night, because The Bachelor was on. And we had a thing to go to. Don’t worry--that won’t happen again.
We like to read blogs that recap our favorite TV shows (see: The Bachelor). Half the fun of watching an amazing/awful program is revisiting it the next day via Internet snark and memes and GIFs. But woefully, one show flies under the radar. Luckily, we are here to fill that void. Jeopardy makes us think. Jeopardy makes us laugh. Jeopardy makes us cry. So, just when we thought we couldn’t sink any lower, here we are. Blogging about Jeopardy.
Who is ready to JeoPARTY?
Let’s get started. We’ll take “Bad Ideas for Blogs” for $200.
First of all, the show was pushed back a full hour and a half due to the State of the Union. WHAT IS AIN’T NOBODY GOT TIME FOR DAT.
On tonight’s show we had returning champion Nicholas Berube, who wears his hair long (WHAT IS TO COVER HIS EARS), seems chill (WHAT IS CHILLAX),and gets props for getting the Jeopardy cameramen to cut away to his brother in the audience (WHAT IS UMM ADORABLE). In the three weeks we’ve been watching the show, we weren’t entirely convinced there was actually a studio audience. The iron curtain has been lifted!
The middle seat belonged to Eddie Munster sporting a 1980s fishtail tie (truthfully, we have no idea what his name is, but we’ll find out tomorrow since, WHAT IS SPOILER ALERT, he won tonight).
Lastly, there was Rebeca (correct spelling), whom Alex referred to as “Theresa.”
Some fun highlights included a MIME category (to be precise, “A HISTORY IN MIME”), a live action category (love those) called FISHY SCIENCE and something to the tune of CARPE D.M. which included the answer “What is Dungeon Master” (got that one right….like we said, single).
Nicholas killed in the category about SNEAKERS, because he is super chill and wears his hair long. Do people still wear Saucony anymore? WHAT IS SAUCONY? No really, what is it? Nicholas was hellbent on shutting down the SALADS category next, but no such luck. But boy was he going to be damned if Rebeca tried to steer him away. An intense volleyball broke out, with Nicholas incorrectly answering a question about salads, then Rebeca incorrectly answering a question about ACADEMY AWARD WINNERS beginning with the letter ‘A,’ oftentimes forgetting all together that the answer had to begin with an ‘A.’ In a flash, Nick tossed us back to salads, and quicker than you can say “dressing on the side,” Rebeca was botching yet another Academy question. Salads, Academy Awards, salads, Academy Awards. Greek, Amadeus, cobb, Alan Arkin. Is your head spinning yet? At this point, Eddie Munster not even on the board, and neither Nick nor Rebeca impressing at all in the categories of their choosing. Alex had to remind “Theresa” several times that the answers had to start with the letter A. And then a Jeopardy crew member had to remind Alex that Theresa’s name was actually Rebeca. Welp.
Needless to say, Rebeca was way off when she wagered $800 in her favorite category’s Daily Double that the 1984 movie nominated for 11 Oscars and winning 8 (including costume design) was WHAT IS TITANIC.
For the record, we aren’t laughing at Rebeca for not knowing that Titanic starts with a T (aka NOT AN A) and was released in 1997 (DIDN’T EVEN HAVE TO GOOGLE THAT). No. We are laughing at her for this:
The best/worst part of Jeopardy takes place at the beginning of the second act before Double Jeopardy, when we take a break from answering trivia questions at rapid-fire pace to get to know our resident smartypants a little bit better. We like to call this segment “COOL STORY, BRO.” On tonight’s episode, we learned the following:
Rebeca/Theresa went to Africa/Morocco.
Eddie Munster got lost in Asia, and Alex Trebek tried his hardest to convince him that this was actually a fun, not horrifying, experience. But the Munster didn’t bite. So moving on.
Chill Nicholas’ brother helped him learn about paintings, which was a waste of time because there weren’t any questions about paintings. They probably should studied up more on SALADS. Really dropped the ball there, guys.
For the third game in a row, Nicholas failed to answer the Final Jeopardy question correctly, which had something to do with LAST WORDS and the Lord in the year 1100. We both guessed Jesus but honestly we didn’t really read the question because we were trying to figure out how to GIF.
In place of assigning the episode a grade here's a summation of how we felt about it:
This will get easier, right?? *shifty eyes* We’ll be back tomorrow, and the next day, and then probably never again after that. Good night. It’s 10:20 PM. Way past our bedtime. NEVER AGAIN BARACK.
